Dolph and Erasmus

Fictional characters "Tom Alford" and "D.J. Kaercher" aren't cut out for the world of gainful employment. They resolve to quit their entry-level jobs to become "Explorationers," each embarking on his own solitary quest, valiantly traversing the globe in search of...well...whatever comes next. The first becomes Dolph Blackburn, a mercenary commissioned to stop an Eastern European dictator from training house pets to destroy Russia. And the latter, Erasmus Tesserman, a highly decorated inventor/innovator investigating a series of phenomena resulting in a Hypercolor™ Great Barrier Reef. Through their correspondence, they inspire and entertain each other with tales of adventures heroic, accomplishments paramount, and rendezvous titillating. Their courses collide when a mysterious yet familiar villain conspires to do the inconceivable -- poison the world's supply of a popular, high-end brand of bottled water. Obviously, this is a fate worse than death.